[bandityogaParticipant]

Ian got home from hospital today. He is coping well and we are so happy. We had a glass of rioja with dinner to celebrate. Carer coming to put him go bed at 8pm. He is tired tonight and happy to go to bed. I thank god .for having him home. We will take each day at a time.

Maureen

[jmsmythParticipant]

Maureen so glad that Ian is back home where he belongs. Hope you enjoyed your wine 🙂 Frank is beside me snoring his head off. At hospital on Wednesday but unfortunately his consultant is on long term sick leave and replacement leaves a lot to be desired 😀

Hope Ian goes from strength to,strength. You will not know yourself having him home. ENJOY

Jeanx

[eveParticipant]

Hi Maureen

Well this has been a long time coming,must be an emotional moment for you both:-)

One day at a time,has to be the answer,I hope you both have a long remission ,and planning ahead,make the most of what ever time you have, I think Jets quote it's not about surviving the storm,but learning to dance in the rain is very apt.Eve

[tomParticipant]

Aww am that pleased for you both, take your time no rush to do it all at once and the healing proccess will get you both through this.

Lots of Love to you both

Tom Onwards and upwards xx

[bandityogaParticipant]

Hi Jean, Eve and Tom

Ian Hasn't ventured out yet and still sticking to hospital regime . I will have to encourage him to change and start living life again. It is not easy adjusting to each other again. Ihad to go out for some space today as Ian expects me to do everything but he has to be more independant and not bark at me. He is also complaining of back pain so we have arranged an mri scan to be on the safe side. Hope that it is only muscular pain.
Maureen

[eveParticipant]

Hi Maureen

I hate to say it but start the way you mean to go on, you will feel guilty at times, but it is your life too!!!
They become so dependent on you, plus Ian has been a long time in hospital, it is hard.

I take Slim out practically ever day, even when its the last thing he wants to do, and he walks first holding on to his wheelchair then I push the rest of the way, it is better than just sitting in doors.
I do hope things work out for you.love Eve

[EvaParticipant]

Hi Maureen,
This is an amazing milestone considering what has happened before. It's time to give thanks, and yes, to work out how to best be there for each other.
No matter how physically compromised we may be, there are still choices we can make about how we spend the day and the vibes we give off towards our partners.
Having said that, there are going to be times when we are overwhelmed by the intensity of our feelings and the scale of the changes we've had to endure.
Thinking of you,
Eva

[bandityogaParticipant]

Hi Eve

Went out shopping with Ian today to our local M & S store but had no time for coffee as carer comes at 3pm to put him to bed we had to rush home. Thinking of cancelling carer at this time as all they have to do is take off his shoes.

Thought life would get easier but had a good cry and feeling better. I will try to encourage Ian to go out each day when the weather is good. Also trying to encourage him to do more for himself. Made a cup of tea for breakfast but had a row before he would try it.

Hope life is good for you both.

Love Maureen x

[jeapal23Participant]

hi maureen. I have read some of your posts. be strong you have a lot of adjusting to do take one day at a time and look after yourself.

[HelenRParticipant]

Hi Maureen,

I'm so glad to hear that – I do check in on here fairly often although less than I used to, and it was great to see the news of that date coming up and then now that it's finally here!

I can see that it must be hard, and Ian and you must both have all sorts of emotions raging all over the place – but I am sure it will get better and settle down and be much better than it feels like it can be right now. Even after just 4 weeks in hospital I do remember feeling it disorienting being back – and I can also remember taking it out on my mum who stayed with me in my flat the week I came out. But I bet Ian will go from strength to strength and hopefully you'll be able to get over the lumps and the bumps and even laugh about it before too long. You've made it this far and I bet you can make it through this bit too. I expect Ian can do more than he thinks he can but it will take time – I totally lost my confidence and he's been in so much longer.

I'm actually writing from Boston – just at the end of my first work trip which I've done since myeloma and although I was very tired at times it has been good overall. I was also bumped off my return flight yesterday evening as it was full so I've had a weird but quite nice 24h making the most of the swimming pool in the Hilton at the airport, and I probably have a free flight as compensation so have been daydreaming about holidays 🙂

Good luck with the transition time and have plenty more nice rioja moments in between the tough times – and onwards and upwards! (Copyright Tom)

Helen

[eveParticipant]

Hi Maureen

how are things going!!:-) one day at a time and deep breathing!!!, it is a long time to be in hospital, so adjustments will not come easy, I have to fight Slim to get him to go to hospital>:-( we have the rows so in that you are not alone, took me awhile yesterday to convince Slim he had to be checked over and had to go to A&E. The tears and frustration of the whole episode wore me out, but I was right his platelets were 5.so kept in and platelets sent from London.I know he will eventually say he is sorry for giving me such a hard time, but it breaks your heart when it happens, so some times you have to stand firm, because in there heart they could not manage with out you.

Can I just ask Helen, did you enjoy your holiday, was it all you expected:-P

love to you both Eve

[bandityogaParticipant]

Hi Eve

Still trying to adjust. Taking Ian out each day but still having our rows. Wanted him to walk outside a little on his zimmer and then go for coffee. Ended up rowing as he wants me to make sure about parking, toilets etc for disabled. I parked the car and couldn't get the zimmer out as I was too near to the next car. Ian shouted at me and we ended up going home.

Think I am trying to do too much. Stained one side of our bathroom door this morning. I'm not coping very well.

Hope Slim gets better soon.

Maureen

[bandityogaParticipant]

Hi Helen

I am still trying to adjust to the changes. At the moment it is one day good and next day bad. I want Ian to be able to get back his strength and lead a normal life but if I do everything for him that won't happen . He is quite happy to sit and watch tv all day while I run myself ragged.

I am starting small and encouraging him to make a cup of tea and walk about a bit. He was accessed by the physio at our local hospital on Friday and we were encouraged by what he can and will be able to do but he will need to put in some hard work.

Hope you had a nice holiday and get your free flight.

Maureen x

[bandityogaParticipant]

Hi Eva

Still trying to adjust. I will have to concentrate more on taking Ian out in the morning and leave the housework until later. It isn't easy but we will get there. Ian has to speak to me more civilly and we both have to have patience . It is'is oneeasy though.

How are you? Has your toe mended and did they change your treatment?

Keep in touch.

Maureen x

[bandityogaParticipant]

Thanks Tom. Have to learn to have patience and not expect too much too soon.

Maureen

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