[maryandteresaParticipant]

Hi

My dad Patrick passed away Easter Sunday and I have posted about his passing on here before to hopefully help those dealing with the same or worrying about facing it.

Just wanted to add that my sister found some videos of dad on her computer she had forgot about and it was so great to hear his voice on them. The daft thing is he was moaning about my sister not looking after her lawn (he had so carefully laid) and moaning about the Sunday lunch she had cooked (only in a joking way) but this was typical dad so for us it was nice to see him as he really was and not some rose-tinted romantic version!

It's still early days but, as the months go on I do find myself remembering things about dad and smiling not crying. Love to everyone on here dealing/caring/involved in the life of someone with MM. Mary X

[maryandteresaParticipant]

Hope your're feeling OK Dai – if it's not one thing it's another eh! Typical. Theresa and I would love to meet up with you sometime and happy to meet somewhere near you if that's easier. At the moment I am fundraising for my sky dive (cancelled due to bad weather it is rescheduled for 5 Nov (gulp!)) but if you organise anything, musical or not, I would be happy to help out if I can! Keep on the antibiotices and keep smiling. Mary X

[maryandteresaParticipant]

Yee Ha! So pleased to read this post Dai. No treatment = good times! Enjoy every minute of it. Mary x

[maryandteresaParticipant]

Hi

Just to let folks know that our trip to dads family in Ireland was good, sad at times & upsetting to see the family but it felt right to be there. Mum did great, flying out alone and coming back with myself & Teresa. Still having up & down days which is to be expected but getting on with things as you do.

Hope everyone is staying positive and smiling when possible!

Will report back after the sky dive!!!!! Thanks for my sponsor money Jean xxx

[maryandteresaParticipant]

Thanks for all your kind words folks! I'm off to Donegal Monday with Theresa and I think the numerous suggestions of raising a glass to dad are great! Bit weird thou as dad rarely drank, not much of an advertisement for a Paddy eh! Ha ha x

[maryandteresaParticipant]

Hi Dai

Decided to just check what's happening with everyone and saw your post. I just wanted to say thanks – a small word which you will hopefully know means so much more.

As you know, Dad passed on Easter Sunday and we have now had 4 weeks without him. Everyone reacts differently in this situation (so I'm told) but for me the tears have come at very odd moments – usually when I'm alone or (terrible to say) a bit drunk! Dad would not be happy – ha ha.

Mum has returned to her part time job with her girlfriends and is diong great considering. Although I know she hates being alone in the house after 40 yrs of marriage, Teresa & I are leaving her to have space now and again as she needs to be alone and accept what is happening – sounds harsh but we don't want her to become dependent on us. Although I did introduce her to the delights of takeway Chinese food on Friday night and that was a hit!

My thoughts are with everyone out there who has lost someone to MM or is dealing with it as an illness now or caring for someone. It really is proper cr*p I know but this forum was a wonderful support for me and my sister and I hope to keep popping in from time to time and look forward to reading the uplifting posts from some of the amazing folk on here.

Love to everyone and stay positive. Mary X

[maryandteresaParticipant]

I am sorry to say that Dad passed away on Easter Sunday at 6.50am. The Wednesday before he passed Dad really struggled to climb the stairs to bed and we were able to secure an electric bed from the local hospice for him on Thursday. The doctor then organised a syringe to feed medication to Dad and this, together with the bed, was such a godsend as it meant Dad was pain-free and very comfy – as he kept telling us on Thursday – he said he felt like he had won the lottery!

Dad got very weak and sleepy although continued to try to drink a little and talk to us. We were told that Dad was faltering and therefore me, mum and my sister Teresa stayed with him from Wednesday, in shifts, so he was never alone. Dad was able to stay at home until the end and, although it sounds odd, it was lovely as he was surrounded by familiar things and people and, towards the end, just kept saying, 'I'm OK'. This was so reassuring for us as a family.

Dad passed Sunday morning and my mum and sister were with him and it was very, very peaceful. We feel so fortunate to have been able to spend those last days with Dad telling him what we needed to tell him and getting reassurance and support from him, knowing he was ready to go and was happy with his life. I know this is hard to read if you or someone you know has MM but Dad was diagnosed over 2 yrs ago and it was only recently that the treatment stopped working for him. Thanks to everyone here for their support and I am sending out love and positive thoughts for you all. Mary XXXX

[maryandteresaParticipant]

Thank you lovely people – it's like I've never been away! Dad did go on Revlimid for a bit Dai but as the tumour on his rib seemed to be growing still the doctors took the view that it was not being very effective. Plus, when dad starting to feel unwell and weak we decided that the trips to the hospital and the battering the drugs were giving him meant that pain relief and rest were more important to him. Just been to see him today (as Teresa & I do every day) and he's sleeping a lot but still chatting away and doing the crossword. Pretty rubbish situation but it could (and maybe will) be a lot worse so just looking for the positives! Have a good weekend everyone – sunshine forecast – hurrah

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