[RobertaParticipant]

Dear all

I'm nearly three months post transplant now and I am doing well blood count wise. I have my bone marrow biopsy booked for 10 December, would so love to be told I am in complete remission.

Today, I am feeling very tired and a bit down. I am so thankful to be here and am doing well so I feel so ashamed that I allow myself to feel this way.

One of my problems is, I mentioned this a while back, is that there are some family members who I thought in a crisis would be close and they are not. My husband is now suffering from ill health and we get no help or support, I have sort of tried asking for it a few weeks ago but nothing happens. I feel hurt, what is the way forward, I need to get over it. It's just such a big shock. I feel for my husband because they are from his side, I cannot discuss it anymore, I need to forget it and move on. It is so sad. It really makes me realise I mean nothing to them.#

Sorry for my rant.

Love Roberta

[PerkymiteParticipant]

What a terrible situation for you Roberta.
Some people just do not want to get involved fearful that it may impinge on their lives and they may find themselves committed to a difficult and demanding situation they cannot control and perhaps that is it.
I think you are right you somehow have to find the strength to move on. They appear not to be coming to your aid and you will only make yourself sick thinking about it. I wish I could help someway but I know I cannot other that try to be here, with everybody else, for you.
Kindest regards
David

[brochoParticipant]

Dear Roberta firstly please dont ever feel you need to apologise for letting your feelings out , there are lots of us here who are only too glad to listen and help if we can . No wonder you feel so low I can only imagine how hurtful it must be . The only thing I can think of is maybe to write a letter asking for help for your husbands sake , perhaps they really dont realise how much you need them . If they dont respond then they arent worth knowing and as you say you will have to move on .It will be their loss Roberta you sound like a lovely caring person who doesnt deserve such unkindness. If I were you I would perhaps ask to speak to a macmillan nurse or advisor to see if they can advise you about getting some help Sorry my words probably arent much use but please keep posting love Bridget x

[GayeParticipant]

Dear Roberta – I too am sorry that you are in this position and agree 100% with what Bridget has written. It's a rotten position to be in but sadly we know all too well that some families respond differently to how we hope and expect. The Mac nurse may well be a good start so do give them a try. If she can't help she will surely know somebody who can.

Remember the most important thing. You are doing really well with your treatment and I too hope for a complete remission for you. You deserve it.
Love, Gaye xx

[KWilsonParticipant]

Such a difficult situation and yes, these circumstances do sort out your 'true' supporters.

I haven't anything helpful to say but hope you can find some way of resolving this.

However, if you can't and you need help because both of you are ill, it may be a good idea to discuss this with your local health care team to see if any community help is available for you.

xxxxxxxxxxxx

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