[DaiCroParticipant]

Good morning all, it is a fine dexless day here in sunny South Notts.

My thoughts were with Kevin, Patrick, Patrick and Michael this morning and with the lives being picked up around their leaving… parting notes, priorities, sense of loss, lesions of love, little surprises, numbed moments, long numbed moments, longer numbed moments and general coping.

I just wanted to leave a note for their loved ones, the carers that we knew and know, who were as big a part of this forum than any here now or past. You are our friends, we care for you, we care about you. Please do not feel obliged in any way to hang on in here on our accounts… through obligation or guilt, or simple but fixed association. You have a new life ahead of you, not of your choosing and no doubt it seems a large void for the most part.

But it is yours for the making and taking. So make it and take it… if you can terrify it with your refusal to let death and dying shape you. Be… whatever you want to be. Flourish in the sorts of understandings that has brought you to this moment, use your experience to ensure that you and yours are no longer frightened by life… but slowly, surely and without compromising your right to grieve, grow, acknowledge and remember.

However, If you do want to pop in now and then it would be wonderful to hear of your bicycle rides, holidays, shopping trips, days out, days in and a thousand other small joys, triumphs and tribulations.

We, ever changing but still we, will still be here… with a virtual cup of tea/coffee/horlicks and a willing ear, always open to the tuneful sound of a much cared for and loved friend.

Dai.

[michelleakitt29Participant]

Hi Dai

That is a lovely message to families and friends that have loved and lost.

with much love michelle x x

[AMcGuireParticipant]

Awe bless you Dai, what an absolutely beautiful message – I've got goosebumps all over. I'm sure those who have lost someone dear can relate to every single word, you have truly spoken from the heart.

Much love,
Angelina xx

[brochoParticipant]

Dai as always you have found the beautiful words to say what so many of us would like to . I hereby nominate you as our resident wordsmith, I would have said poet laureate but I think someone else got that gig love Bridget x

[MinParticipant]

Dear Dai,
You have a gift ……………………knowing exactly what to say……………………………………. and exactly when to say it and I for one am very grateful that you have said what I would have liked to say but didn't know how.
MIn:-)

[BADGERParticipant]

Oh Dia

such beatiful words you can give a voice to what others think

Love Jo x

[DaiCroParticipant]

Thank you all but it was for and about them, not me (if you see what I mean). I want a group hug and cuddles, I want to take their pain away… but I can't, so at least I can share a drop of humanity and try to tell them that I and we are always here… and when one of us drops away there is always, most unfortunately, a new group of wonderful, frightened, scared, helpless, hopeless people who soon settle into our company and take on the mantle of sharing, caring, tee-shirt wearing advocates and friends.

We are very, so very fortunate to have this board… and meeting Ellen and her staff at the Nottingham INFOday was a true pleasure and an inspiration. Thank you Myeloma UK. 😉 😎 🙂

Dai.

[tomParticipant]

Well Dai

What can I say :-/ Lord knows I wanted to say something but couldn't:-( I am so pleased that you Dai helped the likes of me in putting it across with feelings from our hearts, Lord how the tears seem to come easy 🙁

Love and many hugs

Tom xxx

[zasrsParticipant]

thank you dai i so wish i had your way with words must be the celt in you!

best wishes sarah ( very english very stiff upper lip unfourtunly) ( cant spell had to much wine)

xx

[jmsmythParticipant]

Dai. Thank you so much. You can put in words what most of us are thinking.
Love Jean. xx

[maryandteresaParticipant]

Hi Dai

Decided to just check what's happening with everyone and saw your post. I just wanted to say thanks – a small word which you will hopefully know means so much more.

As you know, Dad passed on Easter Sunday and we have now had 4 weeks without him. Everyone reacts differently in this situation (so I'm told) but for me the tears have come at very odd moments – usually when I'm alone or (terrible to say) a bit drunk! Dad would not be happy – ha ha.

Mum has returned to her part time job with her girlfriends and is diong great considering. Although I know she hates being alone in the house after 40 yrs of marriage, Teresa & I are leaving her to have space now and again as she needs to be alone and accept what is happening – sounds harsh but we don't want her to become dependent on us. Although I did introduce her to the delights of takeway Chinese food on Friday night and that was a hit!

My thoughts are with everyone out there who has lost someone to MM or is dealing with it as an illness now or caring for someone. It really is proper cr*p I know but this forum was a wonderful support for me and my sister and I hope to keep popping in from time to time and look forward to reading the uplifting posts from some of the amazing folk on here.

Love to everyone and stay positive. Mary X

[GayeParticipant]

Dear Dai – such beautiful words on a beautiful but windy day. What has struck me is that 3 deaths have come after such a long time but sadly it is inevitable with such a vicious disease.To all of us battling with myeloma well done for the courage and fortitude you have all shown in however you have faced it. To all carers and families supporting us thank you so much. Dai is so right in saying about the future – I remember being told that "nothing ever stays the same for ever" and its true.

I wish you all the courage and love in the world.

Love, Gaye xxxx

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