[jaimeParticipant]

My Mum, who is 64, was diagnosed with Myeloma, total kidney failure and heart problems 18 months ago, 3 days after my dad died suddenly. I have worked hard to help in every way i can but I live 400 miles away and cant move closer as my daughter is in school and doing her gcses. I call regularly, daily often times and I spend every holiday I can afford to looking after Mum. I have 2 older siblings who both live very close to Mum but do as little to help as they can and then only when I beg them to. I worry constantly and I was wondering if there is a befriending service or something similar i could set up for Mum, just to know she is not on her own all the time. This whole situation with my sisters is tearing me apart.

[tmcintyreParticipant]

Hello,

Some hospitals have support groups and there is a section on here where you can look for anything in your area.

Support Groups

What area is your mum in, there may be members on here who would be happy to get in touch with her. Also if she is a Facebook user Myeloma UK have a support group on there where there is always someone to talk to.

All the best
Teresa

[tomParticipant]

Hi Jaime
Sorry to hear about your Mum and also sorry to hear of the loss of your father.
I would ask at the hospital and or McMillan if there are groups of people that is willing to help, also the churches usually have members that are willing to pop and see people and sit and have a chat….shame your siblings aren’t standing up to the plate when your mum really needs them…so sad….
Hope you can get some help and company for your mum…..onwards and upwards

Tom x

[jaimeParticipant]

Thank you for your replies Teresa and Tom. I cannot even begin to express how distressing my sisters lack of empathy is but as you say onwards and upwards. I have been in touch with a group local to my Mum and they are visiting her on Thursday to see if they can be of any help. Mum is a very strong willed lady and is adamant that she will not have carers so I have to be very careful who I get involved!
We will see how it goes from there. Best wishes to you both.
Jaime

[cygnetParticipant]

Hi Jaime,

I’m so sorry to hear you are juggling all of this – try to make sure you make time for yourself too in the midst of all this running around for everyone else…

Age UK may be able to help – have you looked to see what is available in your mum’s area? They offer some social support – also maybe your mum’s renal specialist nurse or surgery might be able to help.

I wish you well – when my parents were alive they lived 400 miles away too. Trying to support them was excruciatingly hard work but I have to say, worth it in the long run, as no-one can take your happy memories away.

Sending lots of love and hugs,
C xx

[tomParticipant]

Hi Jaime
It’s great to see you have a local group that’s getting involved, am sure yer mum is very strong willed so it’s best they just pop in for coffee and a chat, it will be great if it all works out, it should give you peace of mind as you go through all this…..onwards and upwards

Tom x

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