[sessakellyParticipant]

Day before yesterday Stewarts employers inform him he's being made redundant. They base it on flagging economy, we know its due to his illness and ensuing costs …we can't prove it though. I want to hurt his boss…I really do.

We have no life insurance or critical illness cover, nor mortgage protection, just income protection.
We will be unable to make repayments soon

We have a baby, I will return to work full time, this still leaves a short fall …I am on meagre salary.

We will have to sell , negative equity leaving us with hefty debt…how we pay this is beyond me.
[b]
I'm worried about Stewart. That's my main issue. Money, bricks and mortar they aren't the biggest issue. He loves working, it's kept him going through his treatments. I know he feels bad. He keeps apologising and says he's a failure. He's anything but, I admire him , his strength.
[/b]
Stewart will no longer have bupa health insurance. Can anyone tell me if this is a very bad thing or can nhs treatment be equivalent? I called bupa and they quoted £300 per month …another thing we can't afford.

Just when I thought things couldn't get any worse…..

[dickbParticipant]

OK, first things first – it doesn't rain, it pours!

Next, Forget his employers, you will be wasting energy on something you have no control or influence over. As for lack of insurance, being in your 40's you would not have thought it necessary so don't waste energy on if's and but's. What is important is your baby and your family. Stewart probably feels guilty about the situation that your family are in. Is he still mobile? Can he still do some work? He will be helping you when you work by looking after your baby. He will be sorting out other administartive things so he will still be supporting and providing. As for the mortgage, who are you with? I know Nationwide offer a year's mortgage holiday if required for those who have a mortgage with them for over a year. Others will offer interest only payments so the actual capital debt does not increase. Check with your lender, at the moment to repossess is politically damaging and the lenders are trying very hard to tell us what nice caring people they are.

As for Bupa and the other private health companies, don't bother, they are not interested in anything not mundane, I will be very surprised if they have their own MM specialists, you will have ended going to the NHS anyway so don't waste your money. There are some fantastic hospitals with superb facilities in the UK, now Stewart has been diagnosed let the NHS deal with it. Where do you live? There will be someone on this forum close by who can help I am sure.

Just as a guide I am not working, my wife is the sole earner in the house, we have a 6 year old daughter and we are both in our 40's. We are presently in rented accomodation, though money may not be as tight as for you, there are similiarities in our circumstances, I know how Stewart feels because I felt just as guilty and useless as he does. We have moved passed that phase and so will you. I am sure Stewart can find something, be it voluntary work to start with or on minimum wage part time – I help out at the German Red Cross for 150 Euro's a month for 6 hours a week. It's not for the money but self esteem and having some worth. There is a way out, you just haven't found it yet.

[Anonymous]

I don't normally reply to posts on the forum, as I feel I am not experienced enough to do so, (only diagnosed Feb 2013) but I do read them all.
First of all, I would like to say that my heart goes out to you and your family, to have to go though redundancy and cope with Stewarts MM must be very upsetting let alone soul destroying. I would also say "forget" BUPA, as there are some fantastic NHS Consultants /hospitals out there, in fact I would say that the NHS consultants are just as much informed about MM as any BUPA Consultant. I am being treated in three NHS hospitals, Yeovil, Taunton and Bristol (all under the same consultant) and can't fault a thing. I am sure that you will get plenty of response to your post, and I hope things will get better for you and your family.
Ann
Xx

[tomParticipant]

Hi Vanessa and Stewart

I am sorry to hear that the Company has decided to lay Stewart off, and as for Private medical cover I also wouldn't bother with that even if they took Stewart on with his existing MM.

I know that some times the fight is all but gone from us when this happens but it must be worth talking to the company to see if they can lay him off due to his MM? Stewart might then be able to claim more Money from the Government, as for the Home am sorry to see its in negative equity, BUT if this was me and My Young Bride we would sell the house and try and get on the Social Housing system and you can declare yourself "Bankrupt" or try and get help sorting out any debts you have (including the mortgage shortfall) it can be sorted that you pay a minimum and pay the big debts first then move on to the next when that one is complete.

I know it wont be easy but the sooner you tackle the problem and make those aware what is going to happen the sooners its solved.

Good Luck and my first port of call would be Citizens advice bureau (CAB)

Love Tom Onwards and Upwards xx

[eveParticipant]

Hi Vaneesa and Stuart

When these thing happen it seems awful,but it might be a blessing ,is Stuart of sick at the moment!!!,if he is they cannot get rid of him!! If he isn't,get him to approach the company,and ask for redundence through ill health,he could then try for a claim ,on his health grounds. This might take some of the pressure off money wise,talk to CAB,also Mac Millan,have specially trained advisers this can be done by phone.

If you are going to be in negative equity,stay put,just arrange to pay interest only,it can be done. cAB will help you there!! Stuart might qualify for DLA,depends on your circumstances

As for private health care,the only thing that I can see different is some of the newer drugs might be available to you privately ,for example when Velcade came up,it was only allowed by trials or private,but within no time it had been approved by NICE,even bupa you have to go through selection first.

Some times Vanessa,you have to be the strong one,you will learn,that money is secondary to health,give yourself a talking to,and start finding out what you are entitled to!!!. Stuart's health and peace of mind is more important,than any Job.Eve

[DaiCroParticipant]

Hi Vanessa,

You really don't need this on top of all the stress and worry of Stewarts MM… but it is happening and you do have to face it.

[quote]1. We have no life insurance or critical illness cover, nor mortgage protection, just income protection. We will be unable to make repayments soon

2. We have a baby, I will return to work full time, this still leaves a short fall …I am on meagre salary.

3. We will have to sell , negative equity leaving us with hefty debt…how we pay this is beyond me.[/quote]

1. Make a claim for housing benefit from your local council's Housing Department. They will be able to make the interest payments to your mortgage company and perhaps even the mortgage payment itself. As for the rest of this first point follow dickb's excellent advice.

2. If you are truly on a meagre salary you could consider leaving work and becoming Stewart's Full Time Carer… I am not sure how much that is per week but as far as I know it is tax free and as an employment status it will help with other benefits. Stewart will be able to claim 'Disability Living Allowance', most likely at full level which means his allowance is not subject to any other income or earnings from self-employment etc. but he may be better off claiming 'Job Seeker's Benefit.

3. Not necessarily, as shown in answer No. 1.

It also means that he will qualify for full Motability Allowance… which means a new car (look up the Motability Scheme) at no cost, renewed every 3 years. All you have to provide is petrol/diesel… everything else, including breakdown cover, servicing and insurance etc., is covered.

Between your 'Carer's Allowance', Stewart's 'DLA', including the 'Motability Allowance' and Benefits (Housing and Job Seekers) you may well be able to exist at a reasonable level of income while sharing a full-time life together.

Your local Citizen's Advice Bureau will be able to help… plus they can check on Stewart's Employers to make sure that they are laying off staff due to 'Economic Downturn' and not just using it as an excuse to get rid of Stewart due to his illness. As you suggested, the firm could lay Stewart off due to long term illness which will make it easier for Stewart to make his claim for unemployment (backed up with a letter from your GP and your Consultant). Remembering that redundancy means the job is being made redundant NOT the person… so if someone else takes on Stewart's job the firm will be acting illegally.

Look up 'MacMillan Nurses' and contact them… they have a team that deals with all these issues and they will be able to help you on all the items above and more… including a small, one-off payment (£300/400) to get you started).

All the very best and keep in touch.:-)

Dai.

[jmsmythParticipant]

Vanessa what an awful thing to happen. It's enough with this bloody illness without any further worries. The others have offered good advice to you re the financials.

We are on BUPA and when Frank was diagnosed 7 years ago he said to the consultant. She was quite annoyed and said that he would get the same if not better treatment on NHS. Frank went NHS and he has been more than happy with the treatment etc he's received. (I get a bit crabby with them at times at times – just worry -but then thats me). There is someone at the end of a telephone line 24/7 if Frank has a problem. He cannot remember the last time he saw our GP

I hope things start to improve for you both

Love Jean x

[adminKeymaster]

Hi Vanessa

I really feel for you both – what a shitty thing to happen. Firstly, As Dai rightly points out, you should check out the ' redundancy' situation. Everyone with cancer is automatically considered as having a disability for the purposes of employment law. It is illegal to discriminate against the disabled in the workplace.

Secondly, I have BUPA cover as part of my job package (I have been signed off work since diagnosis in 2011). I've had chemo and stem cell harvest, but no SCT. I have monthly clinics at my local hospital, but also have consultations at UCH and the National Amyloidosis Centre at the Royal Free. All ths has been on the NHS. I have not used my private cover. I have mentioned on more than one occasion that I have private cover, but each time have been told that it would make no difference to my treatment and I don't believe it has so I'm happy to stick with the NHS.

Good luck!

Tracey

[andygParticipant]

Hi Venessa
I'm in the process of being finished by my employer at the moment. Though they're not using redundancy as the excuse. They will get me off the books due to me not being fit to work. So I probably won't even qualify for redunacy – unless they deem me worthy of such a payment. As been said previous it is illegal to make someone redundant due to having cancer as its classed as a disability and come under discrimination law.
I'm at the moment claiming DLA and JSA the DLA is tax free the JSA is taxed. I'm able to claim JSA as my sick pay from work has run out.
I think the quote from bupa seems very reasonable – I'm on Revlimid and that costs approx £400 a tablet! So my Revlimid alone cost approx £8000 per month. Though having said that I'd still keep my money and go with the NHS. I have read once you go along the private route the NHS make it very hard for you to get treatment on the NHS for something you were previously being treated for privately – not sure how true that is.
If you have income protection does that not cover Stewarts loss of wages?
My mortgage protection ran out in June but luckily I don't owe too much there. I'm in the process of having all my finances and options checked over by a financial adviser.
It's a difficult situation you find your selves in but try and concentrate on the things you can do and try not to worry to much on things you have no control over.

Every day is a gift
Cherish them

Andy xx

[VickiParticipant]

Vanessa

That's a real blow. There are two issues here, stewart and money.oh and the nhs

With regard to Stewart he has to keep a focus, he has gone through many many hardships with this condition. There are other jobs…..anything to keep him focussed. Employers can't make you redundant on the grounds of disability. They must make all reasonable adjustment to make sure you can continue at work. It's hard to prove when they go down the redundant due to economy route? However what reasonable adjustment have they made for Stewart, working from home, part time working, reduced hours, staggered return to work etc.

With regard to money as the others have said look for any benefits and allowances you can get

Thirdly with regard to Bulawayo, don't worry about it the treatment in the nhs is as good as any, Colin had private ,
Medical insurance and they wouldn't cover him so he stopped it. The nhs have been brilliant.

Don't hurt the employer, get even and win. Do your research look at all the options, keep in touch 🙂

Vicki and Colin x

[PerkymiteParticipant]

Hi Vanessa, It is my understanding that most of the consultants working for BUPA and the like are in fact NHS Consultants, they have a private practice and work for the NHS. You should have no fears about going NHS I have had great treatment.

The money side I would definitely make an appointment to speak to Citizens Advice before you take any decision. Before you go write down all your income, debts and expenditure; include everything such as groceries, TV licence, petrol for the car, road tax etc… They will need all these details as well as information about your Mortgage.

Stewarts self esteem – do not underestimate the damage this can do to a human being. Try to get him into a voluntary job as soon as you can if he cannot find work. And be a bit lavish, without going obviously over the top, with any praise for doing the dinner for example.

Lastly has he any direct military connections, was he or his father in the forces for example. If so you should immediately contact an organisation called SSAFA (Soldier, Sailors and Air force Families Association). They WILL help you sort out things, with money and good current advice, and they will stay helping you. (I used to be one of their Case Workers.

The very best of luck.

Kindest regards – vasbyte

David

[dickbParticipant]

Ref Perkymites post concerning the armed forces, there is also the British Legion, the RAF Benevolend Fund am I am sure the Navy have the equivalent. You need to check the criteria for savings etc because their funds are limited (they are charities)but they will help if they can.

[PerkymiteParticipant]

Yes, Dick you are right.

The difference is that SSAFA and RBL encompasses them all, so an application to SSAFA or RBL then goes to, shall we say for some hypothetical person, The Army Benevolent fund, Royal British Legion (RBL), Corps Association (mine is REME), Royal Navy Charities and Marine charities(if he has served with the Marines – like me) , Parachute regiment Associations if he has served with the Parachute Brigade (again like me). It also looks at his civilian service and applies to any Trade union or Work associated Charities. It looks at local Charities – There is one in my area that supports people who have fallen on hard times who live in the Trull and Commeytrowe area of Taunton. The list goes on. There is lots of help out there you just need an organisation like SSAFA or the RBL to find them for you 🙂 and they have the data and information to do that easily.

Kindest regards – vasbyte

David

[janwParticipant]

Hi Vanessa

When I was first diagnosed with myeloma in 2010, I was covered for private medical treatment via my husband's employment health insurance with Aviva. My initial treatment was with Thalidomide and Aviva stated they would only pay for six months of the drug. This was OK because after four cycles, I was ready for a stem cell transplant. Aviva also restricted the use of the bone enhancing drug Zometa for just six months. To pay individually for a monthly infusion of Zometa would have cost me around £600 – £800 per month. Aviva also set an agreed rate for all different types of treatment and when my line was taken out by a specialist who charged above the rates approved by Aviva, I was billed for the outstanding payment.

All of my stem cell transplant treatment was carried out within an NHS hospital with my consultant supervising the process, with the NHS billing Aviva for the treatment at over £40,000. You can see with these charges why BUPA are suggesting a £300 a month fee for your medical insurance.

When I was restricted to six months of Zometa via Aviva, I changed to the NHS in order to continue to receive the drug on a monthly basis. I think the NHS offers a marvellous multi disciplinary team approach to cancer treatment and I have been more than happy with the advice, monitoring and treatment which I have received from my local hospital. I certainly would not worry about cancer treatment under the NHS.

When my husband asked in 2011 to reduce his hours to three days a week in order that he could spend more time at home to look after me, our lads and the household chores, his company MD was not happy with what he viewed as a lack of commitment to the business and has since tried to remove him from the company through various attempts. After two years, the company finally issued my husband with redundancy notice last month, but have placed him on gardening leave to restrict him during his redundancy period from approaching other competitors for prospective work whilst still employed by the company. Luckily, he has a pension from his previous employment otherwise we would be seriously worried about our finances, especially as I also lost my long standing successful franchise businesses and income a month after diagnosis in 2010.

Other members of the forum have offered some good advice on following up possible benefit which you might be entitled to claim. I hope you are able to sort out your financial worries especially as you need to focus on Stuart's health and helping him through the treatment.

Best wishes

Jan

[eveParticipant]

Hi Jan

So so glad,you could offer advice,you are a natural ,carry on.Eve

[Author]

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