[GayeParticipant]

Min suggested that we have a Knock, knock catgegory for jokes and other non myeloma related issues. Well I would like to start it off with something I read yesterday about a Countdown programme this week, where all the 9 letters were used by one of the contestants but not in the way the producers would have wished for.

The letters were (and not necessarily in this order) D H T E F C I S A. I will leave it to you to see if you can find the offending word!!

Love, Gaye x

[hellwingParticipant]

A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in their bed.

She puts on her robe and goes downstairs to look for him. She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in front him. He appears deep in thought, just staring at the wall. She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of coffee.

"What's the matter, dear?" she whispers as she steps into the room. "Why are you down here at this time of night?"

The husband looks up, "Do you remember 20 years ago when we were dating, and
you were only 17?" he asks solemnly.

The wife is touched thinking her husband is so caring and sensitive. "Yes, I do," she replies.

The husband pauses. The words are not coming easily. "Do you remember when
you father caught us in the back seat of my car?"

"Yes, I remember," says the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him.

The husband continues…"Do you remember when he shoved a shotgun in my face and said, "Either you marry my daughter, or I will send you to jail for 20 years".
"I remember that too", she replies softly.

He wipes another tear from his cheek and says… "I would have gotten out today!"

[brochoParticipant]

Hi Gaye this tickled my fancy too when I saw it in the paperMind you it took a few seconds before I saw the word !!Bet there were a few blushes in the studio that day love Bridget x

[PerkymiteParticipant]

The cost of living is going up, but, it still seems very popular8-)

[RozParticipant]

Giving Up Wine

I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner.

I took out my wallet, got out ten dollars and asked, 'If I give you this money, will you buy wine with it instead of dinner?'

'No, I had to stop drinking years ago', the homeless woman told me.

'Will you use it to go shopping instead of buying food?' I asked.

'No, I don't waste time shopping,' the homeless woman said. 'I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive.'

'Will you spend this on a beauty salon instead of food?' I asked.
'Are you NUTS!' replied the homeless woman.. I haven't had my hair done in 20 years!'

'Well, I said, 'I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you out for dinner with my husband and me tonight.'

The homeless Woman was shocked. 'Won't your husband be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting.'

I said, 'That's okay. It's important for him to see what a woman looks like after she has given up shopping, hair appointments, and wine.'

[DebsParticipant]

Am slightly worried that I spotted this one straightaway Gaye….what does that say about me???!!!

[GayeParticipant]

I think it says you have an extensive vocabulary Debs!
Gaye x

[RozParticipant]

Ban Fox Hunting

If you agree with this please send to the powers that be.
Hope we can stop it.

While I always agree that hunting is an ethical God given right,
I think that I would have to agree with the author on this one….
fox hunting should be banned!

Please help ban fox hunting .
THIS MADNESS MUST STOP!!

Signed,
Peter Rabbit

[MinParticipant]

The Silent Treatment
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each
Other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day,
He would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight..
Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,
'Please wake me at 5:00 AM.' He left it where he knew she would find it.
The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM
And he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and
See why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by
The bed. The paper said, 'It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.'
Men are not equipped for this kind of contest.

boom boom this is soooo me! I had to share it with you all
Min

[Author]

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