[brochoParticipant]

Hi everyone although it is very late and most sensible people have been tucked up in bed for ages This is one of those nights when my mind is going at full speed with thoughts that I cant frighten my loved ones withso I am writing it down just to get it out of my system This week I actually had some energy!!Yippee! Well as the house looks like a disaster area serious housework was called for and I hate to say it but I really enjoyed spending a couple of days scrubbing and polishing However on Thursday when I woke I ached all over and the pain in my lower back was very bad . So I thought I had overdone as you do when you feel well But the pain in my back has got worse and its not muscular In fact it is worse than the back ache that radiotherapy got rid of a couple of months ago, my mst tablets arent touching it nor is the severodol I take for breakthrough pain This is really worrying as well as bloody painful I feel certain there must be something going on especially after my recent clinic visit showed abnormal light chain readings What really worries me is that if it another tumour -a) -it has developed very quickly and b) it must mean Revlimid has either stopped working or has never worked Luckily I have an mri on Wednesday but my next clinic isnt for almost 3 weeks and I am not sure I can handle this pain for that long. For some reason this feels like a major chang in my myeloma pattern and much more frightening I really hope I am overeacting and it will not be anything to do with mm becoming more aggressive Well I feel a bit less panicked when I read through this post so maybe I will be able to sleep now , after I take more painjillers Good night to anyone who is still awake love Bridget x

[MinParticipant]

Hi Bridget
Im awake, sleepless and ready to listen Thats what happens when your retired and don't have to get up for work in the morning……… You know how it is in the middle of the night and everything looks bad? After a good nights sleep everything looks better.
I think you have seriously overdone it with the housework and your body is telling you off! On the other hand you know your body, and its obviously worrying you so best do what you know you have to; ring the Hospital tomorrow if you still feel the same when you wake up. Your news about your light chains in probably playing over and over in you mind to add to you concerns. No point in prolonging the agony for yourself if there is something amiss. If you cant bear to do it on Sunday speak to your nurse specialist on Monday morning or leave a message for her to ring you back.
You know you cant ignore it until your next clinic so why wait?
Hope you manage to drop off and get some sleep
Love Min

[brochoParticipant]

Hi Min good morning the laptop decided to go to sleep last night so I didnt see your reply You are right morning things dont seem so scary but I do need to ring tomorrow as this pain is deinitely more than strain, not much point today Thankyou Min for being there just what I needed someone to point outthe obvious which you cant see yourself in the middle of the night!!.I hope you are having a good weekend and Peter is not feeling too bad love Bridget x

[GayeParticipant]

Dear Bridget

Sorry that I haven't replied for a while and you sound in complete agony. You try to do a bit too much and and it repays you with massive pain. I feel for you very much.I think you have got the point that you need to contact the hospital tomorrow and get some idea where the pain is coming from.

I still have no answer to my back pain other than the radiotherapy didn't work but the surgeon who operated last year has asked to see me again to see if he can operate this time. I wish you well Bridget and that you get answer pretty soon.

Much love to you.

Gaye xxx

[brochoParticipant]

Dear Gaye yes housework is a perilous business , perhaps its best avoided if only sunshine didnt show all the dust up!! I am less panicked this morning but will definitely ring and tell them to check my mri results sooner rather than later, the pain is exactly like the original which led to diagnosis so I need to know . I am so sorry to hear you are still suffering you must be exhausted with it I am crossing fingers and toes for your surgeon to find a solution very quickly Operations are the last thing you want but when you are in that much pain for a long time its worth a try lots of love Bridget x

[kaychappersParticipant]

Hi Bridget I do hope the pain killers are helping a little bit today. As has been said I think we know our bodies very well now and a telephone call tomorrow hopefully with ease the pain going on in your head, which you dont need as well. Fear of the unknown is greater than knowing what is going on, at least then we can try to deal with it. Much love Kay x

[AMcGuireParticipant]

Hi Bridget
Just wanted to send my love and some healing thoughts too. Like the others are saying above me here, you may well have got carried away with all the good work you were doing in the house and your body is telling you off and asking rather impolitely to calm down a bit. Although you are more in-tune with your body than any scanner or doctor so will know yourself what needs investigation and what is okay to let be.
Definitely worth speaking to someone in medical profession though as you could need your pain meds adjusted. John used to take MST and Severedol but had them changed a couple of years back and now takes Abstral (a tablet that disolves under his tongue for anticipated pain), and OxyNorm for breakthrough pain which both work well. He also has lidocaine patches which I attach to his back daily which numbs pain and he wears Fentanyl patches too. Lots of pain meds to help make him more comfortable, maybe you need to be "tweeked" too.
John had some hip pain recently which was constantly gnawing and making walking difficult … please don't think I'm mad … but myself and my girls are very much into angels/spiritualism. I was told about the numerical equivalent of a special healing crystal which is 00000001 (seven zeros and a number one). Write the number on a piece of paper and put the piece of paper on the place you feel pain – John did this (he doesn't exactly believe in all this "mumbo jumbo" as he calls it) and after an hour the pain in his hip had gone! Quite incredible really and I was honestly rather shocked myself. Maybe worth a try till you see someone about it.
Hope you manage a stress-free and more comfortable day today. I'm thinking of you and sending healing thoughts.
Much love,
Angelina xx

[jmsmythParticipant]

Hi Bridget

I just want to add my 'penny worth'. I agree with alll that has been said above. I hope all goes well for you. I know the "big bad monsters" come out at night. I have met them a few times myself. My thoughts, and best wishes are with you.

Love Jean xxx

[MinParticipant]

Hi Angelina,
I do believe in the' mumbo jumbo' do you know a number or whatever for stress anxiety.
I am not being patronising, but if there is an equivalent 'Angel Charm" for the terrific amount of stress I am putting myself under I would love to learn more.
Thanks
Min

[BADGERParticipant]

Bridget

you know house work is a dangerous business. seriously I really hope that is all it is all my monsters come at night or early morning if it does not go away get straight on to UCH thats what they are there for

Love you lots JO :-S

[BADGERParticipant]

Dear angelina

I believe in all things mystic there are some strange things in heavan and earth to many things happen not to believe it

Love Jo x :-S

[tomParticipant]

Hi Bridget

Sorry to hear you are feeling poorly 🙁

I am same as all our other friends above, but I was told never to suffer pain or any doubts at all and if any rear its ugly head I am to go straight up to the ward 😀 and I have used it twice so far and its great no waiting no worries 😎

hope all is well and its put down to heavy dusting 😀

Love and Hugs

Tom xxx

[zasrsParticipant]

Dear Bridget

Have just read your post, b….. housework should be banned, as should dust!
I am so sorry to read about the pain in your back and can only agree with everything the others say. We here in eastbourne have a great nurse specalist who i contact when i feel i need to, i am sure you have one too. Hope all she/he can put your mind at rest or arrange an appointment to be seen quickly.

With love

Sarah xx

[lorraineyParticipant]

Hi Bridget, I hope you're feeling a bit better tonight and have been taking it easy. I'm sorry you're in so much pain and really hope it's due to overdoing the dreaded housework. I hope you get to speak to someone soon to put your mind at rest. Take care, sending lots of love and big hugs to you, Lorraine xxx

[AMcGuireParticipant]

Hi Min, just back from the hospital visiting John.
Archangel Raphael is the healing angel, you could ask for his help to take away pain and guide the doctors in the right direction to put you on the road to recovery.
Archangel Michael is the angel of strength and courage, you could ask him to sit with you (I am doing that for you just now also), or stay with you through out your testing time.
Angels are desperate to help us, but ironically because of the law of freewill they need our permission to do so – unless they really MUST intervene in a life/death situation when its not really our time to "head home".
Daft as it sounds, breathe in bright shining light (positivity) and blow out black nasty smoke (negativity)… just visualise in your mind as you do it.
Whenever my girls are scared about something at school I have them imagine a big cocoon of light around them, almost like they are a walking easter egg of bright shining light. I tell them this is their forcefield and nothing can harm them, then for Archangel Michael to go to school with them. You could try that too.
LOL … I hope you don't think I've lost the plot?! Its just all the wee things that get us by, I have dozens upon dozens of books on angels, healing, spiritualism etc etc etc …. there is so much to learn and so much proof that all these things really do work. John still rolls his eyes but after the healing number thingy he's more open-minded.
My youngest daughter Teagan is "sensitive" and sees spirit; Erin, the eldest also used to see spirit when she was younger but can't remember now. I see flashing angel lights when they are close to me, we have lots of photos with angels orbs (the circles/balls of light that show up on photographs that are travelling spirits), we get left feathers quite often, sometimes coins with specific dates on, sometimes we all wake up with the same song in our heads. Its all great proof for us.
Poor you, I feel for you. Its such a shame that you've got such pain over the weekend when GPs surgeries are closed and you don't have the same access as midweek to professionals who can help. Tomorrow is Monday so please do get on the phone and get yourself sorted. John was told NEVER to be feeling pain, always take enough pain meds to be comfortable. I hope they can tweak your medication to settle you or to investigate just what has happened, maybe a fracture with all the good housework you've done lately? No matter what the outcome, you are sure to be in good hands.
Sending love and a healing hug
Angelina xoxox

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